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Coming Home

My sabbatical was amazing. I highly recommend taking some extended time off when life permits - which I know is not easy for everyone to do, so I feel very blessed. Whether you stay at home, volunteer in your neighborhood, or travel the world - take time off to rest your body and mind. As a nation, we work too much and too hard for too many hours.

Traveling to nations that have 2,000 years of history seems to give the modern day inhabitants the right frame of mind – life is a marathon, not a sprint, so take time each day to enjoy life and all that you have. Life is not all about work and collecting “things,” but about so much more. After traveling around the world, it became clear to me that many Americans just don’t get it. We are so focused on being the best, brightest, strongest and often the loudest, that life slips by, stress increases and we miss the important things….

All of my research in graduate school and during the last year with my former employer on the subject of “management” tools like employee sabbaticals was truly academic. Until I decided to take two months off and travel, I did not fully realize the value that comes by taking time to rest, think, and absorb the world in a way that is not always possible when life is a blur whirling and whizzing past us.

My research on sabbaticals suggested that even three weeks is not enough time to refresh – more time is required. I agree. It was not until the third week of my sabbatical that my mind began to rest and forget about all of the details of daily life (many of which are really unimportant, like whether I remembered to wash the whites in hot water). I finally had time to absorb the world around me in new ways – allowing myself to see and experience people, buildings, foods, nature and even human commotion and interactions in ways that I had not experienced prior. More importantly, I had time to reflect and think about what comes next in my life.

Like many Americans, I started working when I was 14 (during high school) and have had at least one job ever since. I never took any real “break” from working or school (or, in most cases, from working and school at the same time). After 29 years of working and 5 degrees later, I found myself slipping down a mountain of diminishing returns in all areas of my life – personal and professional – and at an alarming rate. Stress had sparked a number of changes and bad decisions, including failing to exercise enough, eating too much take-out, and gaining weight (shocking, given the other choices).

The last three years have been particularly challenging, including a demanding job, my only brother’s brain cancer diagnosis, my brother-in-law’s diagnosis of multiple sclerosis, and my father’s diagnosis with bladder cancer, and my partner’s move to another state for a great job (requiring more than two years of weekly commuting by plane), finishing a doctorate in another city which required even more weekly flights (and was, perhaps, not the best choice in hindsight), and the loss of two old friends who were taken from life suddenly and far too soon (at ages 43 and 38). Many thought I was crazy, having just been offered a great promotion to a job with more money, greater authority and responsibility.

Perhaps out of sheer laziness, I decided to resign from my job, take a lengthy break and focus on what could (not necessarily what “should”) come next in my life. Blessed with a partner of remarkable understanding and strength, and a professional opportunity (that came out of nowhere) to join a start-up company with a progressive boss who went through a rough time the year prior, I embarked on a new venture – an extended break at age 42 (which ratcheted-up to age 43 during the break) to allow me to redefine my life moving forward.

My travels have been many over the past 20 years (again, I am lucky to have traveled the world) and have included nearly all continents and about 30 countries, but never all at once and for an extended time period – away from the hustle and bustle of daily life. Having never back-packed through Europe at less mature age, I thought, “Why not try that at this stage of life?”

After weeks of travel, 8 countries, and too many flights, taxis and hotel rooms to count, I pulled out my laptop on the flight home to reflect about what learned on my sabbatical....

Here are those thoughts:

· First, the world is huge and fascinating, and should be experienced with an open mind.

· People are not all that different, just their behaviors differ, and that’s a good thing.

· The French should learn more about air conditioning – and deodorant.

· Prague really may be the prettiest city on Earth, but alas, I have not seen them all (yet).

· A bucket list is required in life. Write it down and start tackling it.

· The Irish really do love their pubs. And, I get why.

· Scottish men really do wear kilts. And, more men should do the same. Lighten up, guys.

· The Flemish love chocolate and beer as much as advertised. Probably more.

· Lance Armstrong is indeed one of the greatest athletes – and survivors - in the world.

· Cancer totally sucks. Life should focus on not getting it, rather than fighting it. Duly noted.

· Health is fundamentally important. Work out and make good food choices. Seriously.

· Meditation is far harder than it looks. Seriously.

· Yoga helps free the mind and nimble the body. And, meditation is still hard.

· People on flights should be more considerate when walking the isles. Baggage hurts.

· People in general should be more considerate of fellow humans.

· Beer is good, but water is better. Again, health is all about the right choices.

· Stress really clouds one’s judgment and inhibits good health. Eliminate it – the best you can.

· Begin your day with a fresh, new perspective.

· Don’t hold onto grudges or bad feelings. They only bring you down.

· Almost any moment can be filled with fun if you reframe your perspective, just slightly.

· Laugh as much as possible – and as often as possible, but not at others’ misfortune.

· The French really do know how to live. And, they have amazing cheese, bread and wine.

· Taking time off can help put life into better focus.

· There is no real reason for war, discord or religious intolerance.

Again, the world is huge and people are really not that different – there is room for all of us